Monsoon Memories

Dear reader, I woke up a few days ago to the sound of rain; let me tell you that the sound and smell of rain is one of the most glorious things that God created !!! I swear I love the winter sun, but there is something about a rainy day that makes people think about hot cups of chai or coffee accompanied with Jalebees, pakodas or just some munchies. Everyone I know agrees that rain makes one feel rejuvenated. 

For me rain bring back memories of trees swaying outside my nani's house and the lawns sporting a freshly washed look. My brother, sister and I used to sit on wicker chairs in the veranda out front whilst it poured and sometimes we were joined by an elder who would then entertain us with funny anecdotes. 

If it rained on the way back home from school, it would just be an excuse to get drenched and when taken to task I used to give the classic wide eyed innocent look and explain that I forgot to open the umbrella so it really wasn't my fault.


Rain was always a time to celebrate , a time when I forgot all about my troubles and simply had a great time. Nothing can beat the countless times that I spent dancing in the rain with or without company. I especially liked to jump on puddles in the balcony. 

I get this insane desire to do a Gene Kelly impersonation from singing in the rain or jump into puddles every time it rains! Have you noticed dear reader, that the older one gets the more quirky these desires become? A thought to dwell upon humm??

Anyway, this year is very special because it is my first monsoon in two years! Yes although I was in the 'Land of Rain' England; the rains in 'Incredible Indyeah' are absolutely smashing! :D where else is it a common sight to see children and even those brave few adults dancing in the rain.

The sheer joy with which rains are greeted in our country is uniquely childlike and refreshing. There are of course those buzz kills who groan and complain about the mud, dirt, drainage and yeah...TRAFFIC! Still do we  rain lovers really care? 


Rains have also been the main stay of all the bollywood tamasha through the dacades and yes, even the so called 'arty-farty'movies I enjoy have not been above using rains as a metaphor for something or the other. :P  So, what is the real reason behind all this monsoon madness and the accompanying nostalgia?   

Rains are probably the time when we are most likely to shed our inhibitions and enjoy the simple pleasures of life.It is a time of fun and romance, of crispy hot food downed with cups of steaming tea, a time when we get the urge to listen to melodious music without any real excuse ( I always want to sing old classical melodies or dance to Shubha Mudgal's Ab ke Saawan Aise Barse)   Someone asked me why I associate rain with sound and smell and my answer is that if one is indoors when it rains, the sound and smell of rain are the first to reach the senses.

 Even now, rains fill me with the euphoria I felt all those years that I was growing up.The frocks and rompers have been replaced by shalwars and jeans and the worries about homework with the deadline for the next presentation but every time it rains I still want to leave everything for a while and dance in the rain.

                              The Incomparable Shubha Mudgal!! Perfect for listening in Rainy weather. :)

The perils of being a female driver !!!

I start this blog with a warning! Yes, a warning that it is rant against everything that makes a girl feel inadequate. Well before you close this page and run for cover my dear reader..let me tell you it all started with my trying to act like a responsible adult!!! 

I swear, it is a constant struggle for people to take me seriously. I am one of those girls who always end up in the middle of the most embarrassing situations imaginable! I always start with lofty goals and end up in a muddle. Let me tell you about my latest misadventure which, only made me into a typical feminine stereotype. 

It was my parents anniversary last Tuesday and I had a big surprise planned out. Everything was going to be perfect, there was no room for any mistakes. The flowers and cake had been ordered, the dinner reservations had been confirmed. Everything was going according to the plan - which was surprising my parents with the cake and flowers and then taking them to their favourite place for dinner. Everything.....except for one tiny glitch, I had to actually go pick up the said cake and flowers!!!  

Now, I am what you may call a reluctant driver...ok! ok I won't lie I am terrible!!!! I haven't killed anybody but, I admit to hitting poles, trees and even the odd wall! So my father never leaves his car keys lying about. I also hate the public transport system in my hometown. So, I decided to be brave and take the car for a spin....Uh... errand, I mean errand when I saw that dad had left his car keys at home (he got a lift to work that day).      

I was confident that NOTHING could go wrong!!

As I slid the keys in the ignition , I felt a curious sense of calm settle in. I could TOTALLY  do it!!!! My dad's car is his pride and joy, I sometimes feel that it is even more important to him that is own two children! The reason I mention this is for you to realise the magnitude of my next blunder! I quickly realised that I had an audience in the form of the housing society guard and a couple of neighbours as well as a few odd passers-by. It was quickly apparent that I was having trouble backing the car out of it's designated parking space. There is a slope that one has to go down and there is a drainage line which had been opened to clean before the monsoon. To cut the long story short, I somehow managed to calmly slide one of the car wheels into the open drain!!! OH the horror!!!!! 

In those moments as I desperately tried to accelerate out of 'the drain' I had the premonition of my father killing me. In those few minutes, I had imagined at least ten scenarios of my gruesome demise at the hands of my father. So the only thing I could think of (I am ashamed to say) was play the 'damsel in distress' card. This card is a powerful one in any female arsenal but must be played with extreme caution.     

The quintessential ' Damsel in distress'

                                                     
 My pleas for help soon brought the most pompous of our neighbours around who, took no time in reading me a lecture about flighty girls, irresponsibility, defiling a man's pride and joy- His CAR...so on and so forth!!! It didn't help when an audience gathered around as this scene of my acute humiliation played on!!!! I had to do something so I did what any self respecting 'damsel in distress' would do. I gave a masterful performance that involved hand wringing, teary eyes and trembling lips! It must have galvanised the audience (all of whom were male!! Ugh) into action and they swiftly manoeuvred the car out of  'the drain'. 

It is important to Always say the right thing when being rescued.

Needless to say, I then had to accept a lift from the pompous neighbour, much to my humiliation!!! Although it did give me a very important thought to dwell upon. Why is it that when a girl blunders about something that is considered a man's job, the blame is placed on not her incompetence but that fact that she is female?

I admit that I used my feminine wiles to get out of a disastrous situation. However I was also irritated about the fact that I had to actually butter up all those male egos by confining myself to a horrid gender stereotype- that of the incompetent female driver!

I am not this BAD!! But.......well....

In the end though, my parents anniversary celebrations were a success and as far as I know my father still doesn't know about the little tryst his precious car had with 'the drain'!!!  

In which I comeback with a regular blog.....

Dear Reader, I am quite sure that you may have wondered for the past couple of months about my whereabouts. In truth, I have to say that I have been amazingly Lazy...YES you heard me; LAZY. There were times, when I could have written about the things that were happening around me but, I had become the victim of a curious lethargy and was just unable to write a single word. So I apologise to anyone out there who actually bothered to read my incoherent ramblings.

I have to share something. I started this blog in England a few weeks after moving there from India, fresh into my postgraduate programme. I am now a bona fide MA from the University of Sussex and back in India.YES!!! A Masters in Journalism and Media Studies at last!! Hurray!!!

Oh Joy! From a frustrated student with some purpose to a frustrated Unemployed Postgraduate! Just one insignificant speck in a legion of frustrated twenty-somethings looking for jobs. ( I accompany this with a major rolling of eyes ) 

My current status apropos of applications!

Everyone I meet now are suitably impressed with my achievements! I could say that I am the golden girl in the room! However after the first five minutes when the glamour has worn off, there come the dreaded three words- "SO What Next" -some very powerful words...my heart stops and I can feel the air leave my lungs in a whoosh, as my throat just clams up and I can't come up with anything ! Oh the Horror! The absolute horror!

Now, for those of you who don't know me personally, I have this split personality. I am deeply introspective on normal days and then, when facing important people or situations I suddenly become this MONSTER with verbal diarrhoea. I become my worst nightmare.

When faced with important albeit really mundane and expected questions about my future, I wish I could come up with a suave reply. Yet, all that comes out of my mouth are defensive noises and mumblings of a confused nitwit!!!! It's like I am this completely different person observing  someone who looks and sounds like me but is kind of like an exaggerated caricature.

So,I am compelled ask you dear reader, at the risk of sounding excessive obsessive -  Why do we become our worst nightmares when under hugely stressful situations??? I send out this question into the void. So long dear Void. Until the next post.

In which I resolve to stop worrying and start living.....Hopefully!!!

Well dear reader, here I am after a prolonged absence. I think in some ways this long silence was good as it gave me time to think of all the things that are important in my life. To contemplate the future after the life that I've lead for the past year in England.

It really seems like a dream, yet time flies so quickly. It seems like only yesterday when a harassed girl got down at Heathrow to begin studying for an MA at University. Now, a year later there are so many things that I wish I had done. One of the major questions that I keep on asking myself is- Am I really all the things that the people in my life insist I am?

Do we all suffer from bouts of self doubts? I don't know about you dear reader; but in my case these episodes stretch for a long, long time. It's like living in a bubble.....scratch that.......it's like living in a glass case : this state of splendid isolation where one is surrounded by people yet completely cut off by a transparent barrier.

I kept on asking myself question about who I want to be , however at some stage I realised  that I sounded like a bad American teen flick full of rubbish. I think that all of us spend our lives searching for answers and forget to live and breathe and basically appreciate what we have.

So on that note I end this blog post with a new resolve- to make the best of what I already have and live, because isn't that what we are meant to do in the first place? I send this question out into the void hoping that some day I'll have an epiphany and resolve at least one issue....Hopefully!!!!

Could end up looking like this if I don't stop worrying!!! :D

Weighty Issues

Dear reader, I begin this post by sending out this question - Why do we do some things and why is it that even if our conscience demands it we cannot bring ourselves to do other things?

This question has plagued me for a long time and I donot think that the answer is simple and uncomplicated. Well, I for one am the queen of avoiding all that I might find unnecessary. No.. Really! I can come up with a million reasons to not do a task that I find unpleasant or am just too lazy to do . I have to say that I seriously want to reconsider all the failures that I have had in my life and the main reason behind it: Yes that's right "LAZINESS"

An example of the above mentioned syndrome is the fact... or should I say , the major oath the I took in the beginning of May that I would loose at least 10 Kgs and be Size 0 or Minus or whatever A' La Runway Model. Bit by Bit I kept on with the workout regime and if I say so my self got impressive results. However, one trip to London with all the amazing eating options et al; poof! I bloat up like a baloon. So reader, I confess to being a "Glutton" Yes, your eyes donot decieve you , of all the seven deadly sins , it is gluttony not sloth that I am plagued by! Oh yes, the workout regime was resumed again as soon as I returned but Oh all that sweat and hardwork of the previous few months had gone to the dogs!!!! But hey! indulgence is the way of life and although complicated to digest , it isn't just something that us lesser mortals are prone to, even the gods give in once in a while.

My indulgences in rich comfort food have however landed me back to where I started although I suspect that I may now be a couple of Kgs heavier! But as I gorge on a yummy blueberry cheesecake, I cannot help but rememeber that old cliche "Live life to it's fullest". Hence I lay the issue of my expanding girth to rest...... For a while!!
    

My dream image...... Sigh!!!!

  Vs My worst nightmare......shudder!!!

The Queen of Fiascos!!

Yes, I admit there have been moments in my life when I have been at the summit of success and have felt infinitely important! However, more often than not , such events in my life seem to be followed by periods of complete and utter chaos.

Just when I prove it to myself and the world that I can do no wrong, EVERYTHING I do seems to be wrong!! All the plans and tasks get botched up or end up a disaster. It's true!!

Dear Reader, before you start taking this piece as a tale of woe, let me assure you that all the 'disasters' are my own doing! The result of  my overzealous efforts to top my previous deed. It is just this tendency to overdo a task  on my part that ruins what might have been at least a decent outcome.

I can imagine the puzzled expression on your face and just to make you understand my dire predicament, I give you - 'Tales from the kitchen'. Now just for your information I am a pretty decent cook and I do excel at some of the dishes that I have perfected after hours of 'slaving' over the stove. It's true, that the journey to perfecting such dishes was a hazardous one and involved one too many mishaps... but in the end I managed to perfect the art of preparing the said dishes.

However, my curse of enthusiasm rears it's ugly head and soon, I become engrossed  in 'improving' an already perfect dish. The results, as you may guess are disastrous and if anyone happens to bear witness , then it is at a greater magnitude !! And woe betide if  I emerge unscathed from the fiasco......NO! The tale of my failure has always been a favourite topic of the 'evening's entertainment', bandied about for months if not years as an anecdote that is sure to leave the company in splits. On the occasions when I have been present to hear my tales of woe being retold to a mirthful audience, I have secretly wished for a painful death for the narrator or a swift one for myself. However, as I am a survivor of many such incidents; I have come to believe in an advice that my sister once gave me.... I 'grin and bear it' , as I am sure to top the latest fiasco with a far greater one!!!   

So Dear reader, I leave you now to go to the kitchen as I have a sudden urge to try this new recipe that I discovered on the internet. I fancy that I can add some of my 'innovative methods'. Hopefully the end product will be like the the photo below, so wish me luck!

Onion, marjoram and crème frâiche tart yum!!

The unquenchable thirst for "MORE"

 

I was just thinking about a simple phrase "Freedom of Speech" ; perhaps the simplest of all concept yet so many revolutions and wars have been fought for this simple phrase.  However it is important to ask ourselves why it is so important?


As I sit in a room overlooking the sea listening to the breeze and the cuckoo outside the window I can't help but feel safe, even in a land foreign to my own. I can't imagine what it is like for a girl my age who I sitting in a room listening to the horrible noise of gunfire and air raids.


For twenty somethings like me war has always been a part and parcel of our existence. We are the children of the 80's one of the most volatile periods of history. Why? well we grew up in the decade when everything was changing. After the radical 70's the 80's was defined by the quest to earn money and the thirst for 'MORE'.
So for people like me it was one of the most confusing eras to be born in. We were born in conservative times when everything was self centric the world lived under a shadow of conflict. The USSR was dying and it's various satellite states were becoming quasi democratic states.


The advent of the 90's brought the first spate of wars. So children in the first decade of their lives saw their parents listening to the news regarding the first Gulf war and the Balkans. As we entered our teens we witnessed the 9/11 attacks and various other acts of terror. The conflicts in Afghanistan and Iraq gave a glimpse of that unquenchable thirst for 'MORE' that had gained prominence since the eighties.

The human cost of War

It will be exceedingly naive of one to believe that the greed for 'MORE' by which I mean the urge to gain:

Power, Money and everything else wasn't present before the 80's but at least then the world was preoccupied with the Cold War and wasn't really in the position to indulge in anything other tan spreading communism or controlling the spread of communism depending on which side one was on. However the fall of  the USSR left a void that was quickly fill by the leading countries now concentrating on meddling in the affairs of the countries that were of strategic importance to them. Thus came the advent of the era that I like to call "Senseless Wars" . 

In all this the one most important thing that has been overlooked is that simple phrase again; yes, that phrase that was used to justify the needless loss to humanity : "Freedom of Speech". In all these countless wars that were fought since the late 80's that is the one thing, perhaps the most important thing that has been overlooked. 

I can say this with the utmost confidence as I have been part of the generation that grew up with one conflict after the other. As 8 year olds we could see the flimsy reasons behind the conflicts in the Gulf and the Balkans and we still don't see the reasons behind the justifications given behind the myopic reasons behind the world meddling in the Middle East. So, in conclusion if the world now chooses to start another senseless war in Libya , at least the phrase ie, giving the Libyans the "Freedom of Speech" should not be used yet again to justify another wasteful war. 

NATO hit Tripoli

Dear Reader, in my post I had enumerated on the fact that I had to learn to say a lot in a few words!!! Well let me tell you this, for a person like me it is really difficult..... It's true! I have never been frugal with words ever in my life; not while speaking and certainly not when I write.

However, I had this major epiphany whilst writing stories for my portfolio:
"A Journalist is a Word-smith"
As I wrote in my last blog post, I have increasingly realised that, I find it very difficult to convey a lot in few words. After all, breaking the habit of a lifetime is not easy. Another thing is getting people to communicate to you.

I find that getting people to talk to you is very easy but, getting them to communicate that is answer questions.....oooh boy!!!! a Nightmare!!! I tell you...A COMPLETE NIGHTMARE. I have always operated under the belief that people are generally nice if you are nice to them. It's actually true! If you ask for it, there is never a dearth of friendly advice. I think as individuals we are flattered when someone seeks help; it is in a way a boost to our self worth. However, if one begins to ask something which we consider unpleasant, we tend to shut up like a clam!!!!

In the course of this past month, I have come across some really frustrating instances of people either too  communicative or not at all. The fact that I tend to fall in the former group generally, has made me realise how frustrating I can be sometimes. However, this epiphany does not mean that I will now become the complete opposite and communicate in nods and grunts!!

I suppose dear reader, that the answer to this problem lies somewhere in the middle. I know that sometimes the meaning behind a sentence can be expressed in a single word . However, there are times when one has to be articulate. It is the balance between the two that in my opinion makes a good Journalist. whether one is the interviewer or the interviewee good communication between the two parties is highly desirable.

However I end this post by sending out this conundrum, the select few who possess good communication skills aren't exactly dime a dozen so, what does one do with the majority who either rant and meander or nod and grunt?

Tricks employed by interviewees!!!

Universal Problems faced by interviewers!!!

Dear Reader, these past couple of weeks have been a revelation for me....I realised one intriguing fact, that there is a writer in every one of us! It's true! Each one of us has an opinion about things that if I may say so, we are not afraid to voice! Imagine if we were to pen these thoughts on paper. Now, this is where it gets interesting, I think that it is the ability to express said opinions on paper that creates the divide between those who are good writers and those that are terrible at it.

A few days ago I read somewhere this very curiously apt phrase- "Journalism is Literature in a hurry". I must say that in the course of my education in the past few months, I have come to realise how very apt this phrase is and also how inadequate my talents are with respect to it.

You see, I belong to the type that rely on the use of heavy words and descriptive phrases when writing a piece. However, In the course of gathering stories for my portfolio, I have learnt a valuable lesson. One, that has helped me realise just how much hard work goes behind becoming a Journalist. The most important ability that a journalist should possess is the 'ability to convey a lot in a few words'.

A good piece of reporting doesn't necessarily involve the use long sentences or difficult words. Think  about it, would you want to read a news story that has you looking through a dictionary after every few words? Another thing that I have learnt in the past couple of weeks is that it is very difficult to research stories in the real world. I had this really good story about a local community fighting to save an Art Deco heritage building.
Let me tell you that researching and writing it was a struggle from the beginning to the end.

One of the most difficult n bits for me was reporting a coherent, to the point story without reverting into my old habit of grandiose writing. Oh dear reader it was excruciating....habits of a lifetime and all that....!!
Well, I end this post by observing the fact that I may have to curtail these tendencies for my portfolio yet, I can at least indulge in this habit when writing this blog !!