Tuesday, 14 April 2015

Clair De Lune

I love listening to music, I love all kinds of music, but what I love most is listening to classical music. I am listening to Clair de Lune by Debussy; for some reason it reminds me of peace tinged with fiery turmoil, of happiness tinged with a sorrow, of contentment tinged with loss.

I don't know why, but every time I hear this particular piece of music, I get an ache in my chest....or perhaps my soul, for it really makes no sense... Ah, perhaps that's what good music tends to be an experience designed, not for our bodies or minds, but for the soul. That inner being behind the masks that we wear daily to fool people into thinking that their cruel words and actions do not have the power to hurt and possibly maim.

Oh how I wish I could go on listening, just listening to the sublime music that, somehow always manages to bring tears to my eyes. It reminds me of the happy times spent with my father. Of listening to his heartbeat as I hugged him. It is as if the music seems to come from within me. It speaks of the grief that I feel of having lost him and of the joy that I felt just hugging him and loving him.

It is my companion, my only friend.That's what Clair de lune means to me... A piece of melody that transcends everything. It is ME right at this moment... It is a partner in my silent grief but still gives me hope, because in the end it is all in there, the aching beauty of the melody, the haunting notes, that somehow remind me of how much love I have for my father and what I meant to him.

Clair de Lune existed before me and even my father, it gave millions of people comfort, joy and a sense of peace, that is what music does. That's what Clair de Lune will still do, when it's beautiful notes ring out long after I'm gone.

I finish this with a thought I just had, this feeling that I'm not really listening to these hauntingly beautiful  notes alone, I think that right at this moment Debussy is playing Clair de Lune up there in heaven and my father is right there sitting in front of him listening and thinking of me.

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